I Binged Today...

I binged today, it’s been the worst binge I’ve had in a long long time.

About 2 years ago, over the course of 10 months, I lost 8 stone (that’s 112lb or 51kg for anyone outside the UK). The last 2 years have been a real struggle to keep the weight off, a struggle that I’ve been slowly losing. As I relaxed my calorie count old habits re-emerged and I started to occasionally binge eat again. Since the peak of my weight loss I’ve managed to regain a around about a stone (14lb or 6.5kg) and I currently weigh in at almost exactly 17 stone (238lbs or 108kg).

Whilst this is nowhere near what I used to weigh, that being 25 stone (350lb or 159kg), it is by no means small and I’m still classified as clinically obese for a man of my height.

Unfortunately I’ve discovered that losing weight hasn’t really affected my ability to binge large quantities of food, nor has it really altered the maximum portion size that I’m able to eat. Today something in me briefly gave up and in the time it took me to regain control, a period of around 20 minutes, I ate 8 packets of Maltesers, 6 packets of Hula Hoops, 4 KitKats and 2 toasted crumpets. Considering this happened after I’d eaten my main meal, and having already consumed in the region of 1800 calories for the day, I should be feeling horribly bloated and generally ill. The problem is that so many years of constant binge eating has left my capacity to eat extremely high and because of that I barely even feel full. Had I not regained control of myself when I did I really don’t know when I would have stopped or how much I could have consumed.

Needless to say I’m extremely disappointed in myself and am currently feeling quite a lot of self loathing.

Banana And Ginger Oat Cookies

This cookie recipe goes hand in hand with my Not So Naughty Chocolate Brownies as a sweet little treat without the guilt. I based this on a popular 2 ingredient breakfast cookie recipe, that appeared in a free supermarket magazine. I’ve tweaked it a bit to make it more of a treat by making them a little more moist, adding a bit of sweetness and giving them an extra hit of flavour.

You will need:
2 large ripe bananas, mashed until liquidy
180g porridge oats
1 tbsp sweet freedom fruit syrup
1/2 inch piece of ginger, grated

Method:
1. Pre-heat the oven to 150°C
2. Add all the ingredients to a fairly large bowl and mix until thoroughly incorporated.
3. Set the mixture aside for about 20 minutes for the oats to absorb some of the moisture and soften up.
4. Form the mixture into balls and place on a lined baking sheet.
5. Press the balls into cookie shapes, this mixture doesn’t spread as it cooks, and bake in the oven for about 15 minutes, until lightly brown and set.

Notes:
Usually buying better quality ingredients can improve a recipe massively, however, In this case cheaper oats are generally better for this recipe, as they’re often a smaller, broken down, floury oat and will take less time to cook. Dip half of a cookie into melted dark chocolate to make them even more of a treat.

Not So Naughty Chocolate Brownies

Rich, sweet and gooey in the middle, chocolate brownies are perhaps one of the most indulgent treats there is. This is my attempt at making them just a little less naughty whilst trying to keep that rich, fudgy flavour and feeling of indulgence.

You will need:
250g pitted dates, roughly chopped
300ml hot water
125g plain flour
75g cocoa powder
2 tbsp of sucralose based sweetener
1 tbsp vanilla extract
A pinch of salt
0.5 tsp baking powder

Method:
1. Pre-heat the oven to 150°C.
2. Add the dates to a bowl and pour over the hot water, allow to soak for 20 minutes before draining the water into a jug and setting aside for thinning the batter later.
3. Add the dates to a blender or food processor and pulse until smooth.
4. Add the flour, cocoa powder, sweetener, vanilla extract and salt to the blender then pulse until smooth. If the mixture is too dry add some of the date water, a little at a time, to thin it out.
5. Add in the baking powder and pulse until incorporated.
6. Pour the mixture into a greased 20cm square pan, ensuring an even coverage.
7. Bake in the oven for about 20 minutes, allow to cool in the tin before cutting.

Notes:
These will keep for days in an airtight container, though they’ve never really hung around to find out exactly how long for.

Turkey Meatballs In A Savoury Moroccan Tagine Inspired Sauce

You can't really cook casseroles and onepots without coming across the tagine. Tagines are named after they're distinctive earthenware pot they're traditionally cooked in and are generally a heavily spiced, richly flavoured stew like dish. This is my take on a Moroccan meatball tagine, replacing the usual lamb or beef mince with lower calorie, lower fat turkey mince.

You will need:

For the meatballs:
500g turkey mince
1 egg
1 small onion, grated or very finely chopped
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tbsp dried parsley
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp black pepper

For the sauce:
1 tbsp vegetable (rapeseed) oil
3 small onions, chopped
1 large green pepper, chopped
4 cloves of garlic, crushed
1 inch piece of ginger, grated
1 1/2 tsp paprika
1 1/2 tsp cumin
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp chilli powder
1 tbsp dried parsley
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp black pepper
2 200g cartons passata
1 tbsp lemon juice (or half a lemon if you're using fresh)
1 can chickpeas

Method:
1. Add the turkey, egg and remaining meatball ingredients to a large bowl and mix until fairly well incorporated.
2. Form the mixture into roughly 2cm diameter balls, place on a tray and set aside in the fridge.
3. Add the oil to a fairly large, heavy based, pan with a lid and warm over a medium heat.
4. Add the onion and green pepper and cook for 4-5 minutes, until the onion starts to soften.
5. Add the garlic, ginger, spices and herbs and cook for 1-2 minutes, until fragrant.
6. Add the passata, lemon juice and chickpeas, bring to a simmer and cook for about 20 minutes, until the sauce is rich and deeply flavoured.
7. Remove the meatballs from the fridge, add to the sauce, cover and cook for 10-15 minutes, until the meatballs are cooked through.

Notes:
Serve over couscous or alongside a decent sized chunk of lightly warmed, crusty, buttered bread.

Being A Natural Fatty Sucks

My stomach is rumbling like fuck, but I’ve already eaten my calorie allowance for the day and after the weekend I just had (I basically ate everything even remotely edible that came near me) I don’t have any spare for a quick snack.

Monday Morning

A bucket full of coffee and a treacle tart is an essential part of any balanced Monday breakfast. The really sad thing is that this might be the nicest thing that I eat all week.